Fist of Dishonor

How hard do ninjas rock? Why do ninjas and aliens hate each other?

The Vanguard talked with Mr. 1000 Corpses, Missy Ju-Jitsu, Kabuki Bottom and other members from local Portland band Fist of Dishonor to figure out these and other pressing questions about ninja rock, intergalatic space feuds and Jesus’ swordsmanship.

Where are the weapons here? Are you strictly fist ninjas?

Mr. 1000 Corpses: We are weapons…

Are there any other ninja rock bands you guys have feuds with?

Kabuki Bottom: Even for ninjas, it’s hard to spot other ninjas. I mean, there might be a ninja rock band on the bus, but they’re so quiet and so hidden.

Your name reminded us of that band 36 Crazy Fists. Have you thought about melding with them to create 36 Crazy Fists of Dishonor?

1000C: I don’t think they could take it. I think we’d just rip them apart.

So you’re playing with an alien band called Here Comes a Big Black Cloud.

Missy Ju-Jitsu: Here Comes a Big Black Cloud is sore at us because back in the day we busted up their space prom.

1000C: It was an honest mistake…

Missy: It was the best space prom we ever busted up.

Some say Jesus was the first ninja…how does Jesus relate to you?

1000C: First of all, who is Jesus?

Missy: For the record, I would train with Jesus.

1000C: Jesus was just alright with me.

KB: I guess if ninjas really obeyed temporal physics in the traditional sense then, yeah, maybe Jesus did come first. Who came first, who came second, it’s really about who can chop whose scrote off.

In that case you would win over Jesus.

KB: Pretty much…

Fist of Dishonor with Here Comes A Big Black Cloud Thursday, Feb. 22Ash Street Saloon225 S.W. Ash St.$5, 21+