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Answered! Hillary Clinton Edition – Irrelevant information that you need to know

Say wha?

A “great American story.”

-How Hillary Clinton referred to the over $100 million her and her husband have made from book deals and speaking engagements since leaving office in 2000.

Source: The Sunday Oregonian, April 6, 2008

In case you were wondering…

Hillary Clinton has at least one thing in common with Metallica and “Weird Al” Yankovic-a Grammy Award.

Yes, like hundreds of hard rockers, rappers and polka stars, Clinton won a Grammy award. Hers came way back in 1996 for “Best Spoken Word Album” for her reading of her non-fiction book, It Takes a Village. We aren’t sure why she was awarded the highest award in the music industry, but if we had to guess, it would her smooth, seductive tone and crisp, confident enunciation.

Although Clinton now has the same award as other decadent rock stars, we hope that is one of the only things that the senator has in common with them. It probably is. Chances are the former first lady doesn’t have a sex tape with Pamela Anderson, has never ingested massive amounts of heroin and never prayed to Satan. At least we think not.

What the hell is that?

There’s just over a month before the Oregon primary, and most people have one question on their minds: Oregon has a primary? Yes, little did you know, Oregon, like many other states in this wonderful democracy, has an actual primary. And during that primary, votes are in fact counted to help select delegates from America’s political parties, who will later run against one another in the November nation-wide elections. Why haven’t you heard of this primary? Because Oregon’s primary, the redheaded stepchild of political races, rarely ever makes a difference.

But this year it might!

With the May 20 Oregon primary creeping up, the gridlocked Democrats have actually realized that Oregon might make a difference. Hillary Clinton came to Oregon on Saturday to court locals as if she was hoping to take them to prom. Thousands packed into high schools in Eugene and Hillsboro to hear Clinton promote her campaign and diss-smack the other Democratic hopeful, Barack Obama, with well-timed snaps about his campaign slogans and Obama’s support of a liquefied natural gas act in 2005, which she says hurts Oregonians.

Remember to vote! It might be your (only) chance to make a difference in Oregon. Ever.

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