For the second consecutive year, Portland State is participating in the Sustainability Tracking Assessment and Rating System, a comprehensive program that collects data from campuses nationwide to determine how universities stack up in terms of sustainability.
The Portland Winterhawks lost a pair of matches to the Vancouver Giants in the WHL Western Conference Semifinals over the weekend at the Memorial Coliseum, and the next two games will be played on the road
All things must come to an end, my dear Portland State Clown College Bozos. Unfortunately for you, that includes this column in which I’ve tried to educate you on proper punctuation and grammatical accuracy all while poking fun at you.
Portland, as a sports city, is known primarily for having just one major league squad in the Trail Blazers. This year, the Winterhawks gave sports nuts in the City of Roses just as much reason to cheer—and they aren’t done yet.
This is a tough time for punctuation, folks. The Internet and text messaging have greatly spiked the abuse of proper grammar, and it makes a good grammarian weep to take in all the horrendous slaughtering of punctuation.
I once heard a professor say that tuition and textbook prices are so high because, he reasoned, if college kids had extra spending money, they’d waste it all on drugs and booze.
It’s my experience that most people are sloppy grammarians incapable of using proper punctuation (let alone understanding it or appreciating its beauty). This is especially true of college students who spend most of their time with a bong in one hand and a Pabst in the other, the sort of jabbering dunces who really should have just gone to trade school instead of slacking off for several years.
This is a good week, my fellow grammar-savvy students! I even bid a friendly hello and tip of the cap to the Portland State Clown College Bozos! No, the Grouch hasn’t found a Mrs. Grouch to snuggle up with and make plans to spend spring break insulting anyone whose blog is rife with poor grammar.
“22nd of June, 209 A.D., a crowd gathers…oh, they fucking love a good beheading!”
Another week, another round of grammatical failure for you Portland State Clown College Bozos. This week, I’m going to discuss the ellipsis, or “dot-dot-dot” in Bozospeak.
OK, you hapless nincompoops attending what may as well be called Portland State Clown College—seriously, most of you’d do better to stop chasing a degree you won’t use and learn how to make balloon animals or ride a tiny tricycle.