Keeping with this week’s evident theme (that’d be zombies) comes another game that oozes B-movie charm, albeit one that’s presented in a completely different cultural context. And with a name like Onechanbara: Bikini Zombie Slayers, it’s safe to say that you can expect a pretty ridiculous (and oh-so Japanese) time.
In essence, the story has something to do with two sisters, Aya and Saki, who have what’s known as the “Baneful Blood”, a special kind of blood that makes the girls explode in blood-lusting rage after being splattered by sprays of plasma from too much zombie dismemberment.
Technically this is a sequel to the Xbox 360’s Bikini Samurai Squad. The story is a farfetched, convoluted mess, and you can pick up most of the previous game’s events by watching the first few cut scenes.
And really, I wouldn’t expect it to make sense anyway—Onechanbara is one of those campy, shallow cult-hit Japanese games (it’s not even dubbed) that somehow made it stateside.
That being said, the game is pretty straightforward, but for the most part still a lot of fun. Playing as Aya or Saki, you’re armed with swords, so the game is all about hacking and slashing the hell out of everything you see.
The more blood you spill (and my, there is a lot of it) the slower your sword moves from accumulated sticky gore collected on its surface. There are also some useful special attacks and a few Devil May Cry-ish evasive moves at your disposal, which trigger a bullet-time dodge if timed properly.
The violence is stylized and over the top, as you would expect, and as the bodies mount, you gain experience which can be used to customize your abilities. Lop off too many limbs, though, and you’ll be consumed with rage, which makes you nigh unstoppable, but also eats away at your life bar.
What can make Onechanbara difficult is that everything is done either by swinging the Wiimote by itself or using it in conjunction with the analog stick on the nunchuk to pull off various sword thrusts.
The timing on the swings isn’t terrible by a long shot, but it’s nowhere near perfect. There’s really no way to keep your dignity intact while playing the game, either, since it forces you to flail your arms around like an idiot.
Still, as long as you don’t wear your arms out, Onechanbara is a good guilty pleasure. While the environments look bland, you’ll probably feel a little dirty looking at the gorgeously rendered girls (especially when they’re dripping in blood).
The game is mercilessly short, but multiple game modes and unlockable characters extend its life somewhat. For hot Japanese chicks and buckets of gore, you could do a whole lot worse.