Gender health matters!

This may come as a surprise, but there are a lot of differences between men and women. Those differences weren’t so pronounced in kindergarten, but 12 grades later you’ve probably noticed that we treat our bodies—and our attitudes about the opposite gender—very differently.

Some of these points are obvious, but they’re worth discussing given that some folks need it impressed upon themselves over and over before they understand the difference between being from Venus and Mars.

Robert’s tips for the guys

Admit it, fellas: We got the better end of the anatomical deal. Our bodies are pretty straightforward in terms of what separates us from the fairer sex, starting with our excretory systems—yes, I mean taking a leak and dropping a deuce (grow up and read an anatomy book, dude).

When it comes to whizzing, well, we’ve got it pretty easy—just aim and release. I feel we’ve won the genetic lottery if only because we can spell our names in the snow after too many beers. Holding your bladder too often may result in problems later in life, including early onset of urinary retention. This means it doesn’t all flow out on the first try, resulting in more trips to the john to shake the rest out.

Sexually, having a penis is also considerably simpler: Apply even light pressure to our junk and a trouser tent is pitched. The most obvious pecker-protection tips include using condoms during sex to avoid dong-damaging diseases—and don’t go poking your pudd into pencil sharpeners or parking meters. Aside from that, be sure to scrub and rinse when bathing and don’t use Viagra recreationally—your erections are finite, my man, so don’t burn through your inventory now or you’ll miss them later.

The anal region is incredibly sensitive as well and can be manipulated to very pleasurable effect, though many men cast in the hetero-normative mold might mutter about how gay that sounds. To each their own, but there’s a wide gap between being homosexual and appreciating some light ass play every now and again. For male recipients of anal sex, be sure to use water-based lubricants to help avoid issues with bowel control and intense pain.

Speaking of hairy derrière, men should take care to protect themselves from colon and prostate risks. This means wiping thoroughly and rinsing while showering (not a full-on enema, but at least lather your tuckus a bit). Also, if you’re worried about hemorrhoids or feel any sort of shooting pains from your dorsal region, don’t just shrug it off—it’s never comfortable to visit a proctologist, but that’s a time for being safe, not sorry. Just toughing it out will come back to bite you on the ass…literally.

Theo talks lady bits

Us ladies have many tantalizing aspects to our bodies, from our supple breasts, hips and bums to that garden of wonder that is the vagina. However, being considerably more alluring than men (who, let’s face it, can be utter slobs if they’re not dating) means that we tend to have much more pressure to keep things looking pretty and special health concerns that we face.

Breast health is important, given that they can seriously hurt if they’re mishandled. Wearing a bra is second nature for most college women, but surprisingly, most ladies wear the wrong bra size. Breasts may still change in shape and size as we mature, so be mindful of what cradles your chest through old age. Mammalgia, a term for breast pain, is very uncomfortable, though it usually only occurs during a menstrual cycle (or when some fumbling freshman forcibly fondles our fantastic front pair).

Speaking of issues relating to menstruation, this again is something most of us are well versed in, having likely mastered the art of tolerating and keeping it as discreet as possible. Our flows will change with each cycle, so be sure to have a decent stock of necessary-sized tampons or pads handy. In recent years, there have been wonderful innovations in the feminine hygiene industry, making it easier to find just the right product to suit your needs. Want comfort and solid protection? Try a tampon with super absorbency and a soft, plastic applicator for easy insertion. Care about the environment? There are myriad organic, chemical-free tampons and pads out there made just for your hippy vag.

Urinary tract infections occur—given the physical difference—more often in women than men. This is because they’re usually the result of bacteria in the urinary tract, and bacteria has an easier time attacking the vulvovaginal region than it does forcing its way through a male’s stem-like urethra. Contracting a UTI is seriously uncomfortable, so be soft-yet-direct between your legs when bathing. Skip the douching and scented female hygiene products as this can upset the delicate pH balance in our neither regions and cause serious irritation.

Finally, a happy woman is she who stays healthy. No one feels or looks very good when they aren’t healthy, so take care of yourself. Given the greater amount of health issues we face, having a good rapport and regularly scheduled appointments with a gynecologist is a must. He or she can be a veritable encyclopedia of knowledge on women’s health concerns and can help you in assessing what kinds of health care options are right for you.

This can be especially good with birth control, as no two women respond to the same hormones in the same way. Talking to a doctor is, of course, always a good thing to do regardless of gender, but having a good gynecologist who understands your body will not only make you more comfortable, but also support better reproductive and overall health in general.

Medical info
We’re journalists, not doctors, and we did our research via www.familydoctor.com and www.pdrhealth.com. These Web sites are OK for general advice, but for the most accurate info and assistance with gender-specific health concerns, it’s best to visit your doctor or head over to the Center for Student Health and Counseling (SHAC).

SHAC info
Web site: www.pdx.edu/shac
Phone: 503-725-2800
Address: 1880 SW Sixth Ave