Cancer
June 21-July 22
Nothing says sunny days of summer like a Netflix marathon of Orange Is the New Black in a dark room with diet Dr. Pibb and Flamin’ Hot Cheetos.
Leo
July 23-August 22
Guys with the name of Corey are going to be an albatross around your neck this week, Leo. Usually trustworthy, you may feel differently after this run-in.
Virgo
August 23-September 22
Don’t give up hope, dear Virgo. You work hard to achieve your goals and this is only a momentary setback on the way to something greater.
Libra
September 23-October 22
The truth is that you’re not ready for the criticism your peers want to give. You may think you are, but you are a fragile bird unable to hear the truth.
Scorpio
October 23-November 21
Try being a little less April Ludgate and a little more Ann Perkins this week, Scorpio. Kindness and common sense are worth their weight in gold and we’re all pretty sick of your sassiness.
Sagittarius
November 22-December 21
There is nothing wrong with a little humility. Give it a try, you never know what you’ll find out about yourself and those around you.
Capricorn
December 22-January 19
If someone uses this week to approach you about a new opportunity, you should take it. There is a 70 percent chance it’s not a scam.
Aquarius
January 20-February 18
Celebrate yourself by going out for a night on the town, Aquarius! You’ve worked really hard and you deserve a breather to remember why the people you surround yourself with are so great.
Pisces
February 20-March 19
That money is earmarked for something and you can’t really afford to purchase frivilous items at the moment.
Aries
March 21-April 19
It’s kind of weird when mismatched couples flaunt their love. Remember Drew Barrymore and Tom Greene?
Taurus
April 20-May 20
You have to resist the urge to point out when a straight couple makes out in line at Wendy’s, Taurus. It’ll only make it worse.
Gemini
May 21-June 20
Try spending this week learning something new. Do you remember that weekend when you promised yourself you were going to learn yoga?
