Love at last, OkCupid style

For most students experiencing their journey through college, one of the terrifying inevitabilities to face is the world of dating. Whether it be rubbing elbows at the movies, drunkenly hooking up at a Halloween party or making eyes at the library, dating is something that permeates our lives and makes us weak in the knees.

Photo © Humor Rainbow, Inc.
Photo © Humor Rainbow, Inc.

For most students experiencing their journey through college, one of the terrifying inevitabilities to face is the world of dating. Whether it be rubbing elbows at the movies, drunkenly hooking up at a Halloween party or making eyes at the library, dating is something that permeates our lives and makes us weak in the knees.

Living in the technology-driven society we do, however, the ways of dating have changed.

DJ Jazzy Jeff and the Fresh Prince hit the nail on the head when they proclaimed, “Parents just don’t understand.” Our parents’ generation couldn’t have fathomed online dating. Dating in the baby boomer generation consisted of banana splits, bowling alleys and ‘parking’ while listening to classic rock or Simon and Garfunkel.

Your mom or dad might pose the question, “Why in the world would you want to meet a stranger online?” This is a valid and deserving question, albeit one with a simple answer. It’s an arduous task to meet people in lecture classes. It becomes even harder if you live off campus or have a job. Taking a full course load, having a job and living off campus, it’s hard enough to make new friends—how in the world are you supposed to meet a lover?

Enter OkCupid, one of the various online dating websites that matches you with complete strangers based on your profile/personality survey. OkCupid allows you to rate people, add people as favorites and message anyone of your choosing. On each profile you’re able to see a match percentage, friend percentage and, of course, enemy percentage (for those who believe opposites attract).

Living a busy college lifestyle, I realized the difficulty of meeting new people. And it occurred to me that OkCupid may not be so bad after all. If I could take a personality survey and be matched with someone attractive and intellectual, why not? Who wouldn’t want that? What could go wrong?

I decided to go on three dates to see if I could find a connection with anyone. The names have been changed in order to protect the privacy of the individuals.

Date No. 1: Sally

After some lengthy and enticing conversation on OkCupid, Sally and I decided to meet up. On the way to pick her up I was filled with nerves and overcome by a small case of sweaty armpits. Not ideal things to have happen previous to meeting someone, but it made me feel alive.

We went to Montage, a safe bet for any date. Great Southern food, loud atmosphere and low lighting. The conversation was fun and both of us were enjoying ourselves. But! Sally forgot to mention she was slightly lactose intolerant. After indulging in macaroni and cheese we went back to my apartment, where she threw up on my hardwood floors, couch and bedsheets.

There was no second date.

Date No. 2: Marie

After cleaning up and Swiffering three different times to get the stench out of my apartment, I was ready for date two. From her pictures, Marie looked like my type. Fair skin, brunette and good style. We had two phone calls, which were dynamite, before meeting up.

We decided to meet up in my neighborhood and walk to Potato Champion for dinner. When we met, I honestly didn’t think it was her. She looked nothing like her photographs and had sideburns. No offense to girls with facial hair, but if you have more of it than I do, I’d like to keep things in the friend zone.

There was no second date.

Date No. 3: Stella

I received a message from Stella saying she was in Florida until May but would like to hang out when she got back to Portland. We exchanged numbers and text-messaged a bit, getting to know each other slowly but surely. She ended up coming home a month early.

After much anticipation we decided to go to Red Robin for chicken tenders and endless fries. Stella is drop-dead gorgeous—one of those girls that when you see her you’re immediately taken aback by
her beauty.

However, the conversation just wasn’t there. I inquired about her feelings and thoughts in regard to an variety of subjects, but she rarely had any answers. This just goes to show it really is the personality that counts.

Once again, no second date.

After having no luck on OkCupid, I decided to ask out a ravishing redhead from one of Portland State’s convenience stores. Let me just say there was a second date, a third date and more dates to follow.

Perusing OkCupid is like online shopping for a significant other. It’s strange and exciting and weird. If you feel up for the task, go for it. However, while you’re sitting on your bed spending hours looking at profiles you might be missing the magic that’s happening right outside your door.

Don’t miss the magic.