What did you do this morning? What did you eat for breakfast? Did you shower, exercise or read? Whatever you did, it is likely that you had some sort of pattern. A pattern that has presumably developed over the years of your life. Perhaps you might call this pattern your morning routine.
Many people get angry at this sort of routine and fight against it—I know this, because I too once cursed routine. In the days of my teenage angst and rebellion I remember saying, “Every day is the same.” I thought that since every day was the same, it was just routine, and I thought that routine was dull. Where was the excitement, the joy and the adventure that came from living spontaneously every day?
Since then, I have come to realize that there is a magical quality and aspect to every day, and that if you are looking for it, you can find it. I have also shifted my perspective on routine. I have come to see routine as something positive that we can use to our advantage. I believe that routine can be so powerful precisely because of its pervasiveness. For what are routines but a cluster of habits?
Researchers estimate that 95 percent of what we do every single day is habitual. This means that our routines are literally running our lives. It means that 95 percent of what we do every day is something that we chose to do yesterday. The more that routine enters our lives, the less choices we might have to make.
So the thoughts of my youth that routine really does run our lives were partly right, but I was wrong in thinking that routine is somehow bad or boring. I have come to realize that there can be immense joy in the pleasure of repeating small daily rituals over and over. I have also come to believe that rituals and routines like these can have a profoundly positive effect on our lives. Routines run our lives, provide structure and mental relaxation and help to create our future. As Aristotle once said, “We are what we repeatedly do. Excellence then, is not an act, but a habit.”
Right now you are creating habits and routines that you will have for the rest of your life. Habits are permanent—perhaps more permanent than tattoos. Once a habit has been formed in your brain—once a pathway of neurons has been created and shaped in that way—you can’t get rid of it. It will always be there, sitting and waiting to be re-opened. We can’t destroy a bad habit, we have to replace it. Instead of destroying the pathway in our brain, we create a new, stronger pathway to take its place.
And just as we can never drop a bad habit, we can never drop a bad routine; we can only change it. Here is an example: Let’s say that every day after work, to de-stress you go to the bar and grab a drink. That drink normally turns into a few. This drinking causes you to eat a whole bunch of fatty, greasy food. Your diet, or lack of it, causes you to be tired. The science of habit-change says that the secret to changing your routine relies on your ability to find and change your keystone habit, or the habit that might be affecting all others.
Today after work, you decide to lace up your running shoes and go for a short jog. Then you head to the gym to de-stress. After the gym, you feel great and have lots of energy, so you eat a healthy meal and spend the night reading, working and thinking. Eventually, this new pattern becomes your life. You do it without thinking.
It is clear that most of what we do every single day is the result of habit; the result of choices we made years ago. Some, including my 16-year-old self, would argue that this type of routine is boring. They may say that we should act spontaneously and live every second in the moment. Perhaps they believe we shouldn’t get into the rut of routine because it traps us and prevents us from truly living our lives.
I have come to believe, however, that routine is the very thing that lets us live our lives, because by choosing our routine today, we create our future tomorrow. I think that it is entirely possible to be spontaneous while living within the boundaries of a routine. In fact, maybe it’s the routine that allows us to live with spontaneity. I once heard the communication expert, Tony Jeary, say, “The whole idea is to be so planned, so prepared, that we can be spontaneous. I call it planned spontaneity.”
In a way, routine gives us a choice. We can choose to not choose, letting bad habits overtake our lives, or we can choose to work at building and changing our habits until we have the combination that’s just right for us. That morning routine, perhaps the shower and cup of coffee, can bring a magical quality to each and every one of our days, allowing us to live with freedom and even spontaneity.
