Time-wasters

With a whole month away from school, winter break can be a joyous time…for some. Certain people may have a great time traveling or catching up with neglected friends, but for those of us with nowhere to go and nothing to do, the break can get boring fast.

This break, turn off those reruns, invite some friends over (or someone you are hoping to get lucky with) and hold an all-day movie marathon. Here are five special-themed movie marathons for your viewing pleasure.

The “non-traditional holiday” movie marathon

Bad Santa
Gremlins
The Ref
Christmas Evil
Die Hard

Let’s face it: You’ve seen those weird claymation Christmas movies too many times. This holiday season, mix it up with some alternative Christmas-themed movies.

Start the marathon off with the amazingly foul-mouthed Bad Santa, and then segue way into the monsters- run-amuck hilarity of Gremlins. The Dennis Leary–starring hostage comedy, The Ref, will keep it light before you get to the disturbing (and the original) killer Santa movie, Christmas Evil. Finish it all up with the best Christmas movie ever, Die Hard. Explosions and Christmas go so well together.

The “put them in the mood” movie marathon

Before Sunset
The Last Picture Show
Notorious
Red
Last Tango in Paris

Trying to get off with that special someone? Give them a reason to visit your crib and cozy up on your couch with these sensual films.

Before Sunset and its beautiful scenery and intelligent dialogue will show your potential mate that you can be sophisticated. The Last Picture Show and its realistic look at young love and sex will make them nostalgic for the unbridled excitement of high-school love. The next two films in the marathon, Alfred Hitchcock’s Notorious and Krzysztof Kieslowski’s Red, are perfect examples of passionate filmmaking with hints of subtle eroticism. In case your future sex partner doesn’t get the point, end the marathon with one of the most erotic and passionate films of all time: Last Tango in Paris. If these films don’t put your date in the mood, then they are a corpse. And you shouldn’t romance a dead body…it’s just weird.

The “instant cinema connoisseur” movie marathon

Grand Illusion
The Third Man
Ikiru
Wild Strawberries
The 400 Blows

Organized by release date, these films ranging from Akira Kurosawa’s post-war existential drama Ikiru to Francois Truffaut’s French new-wave classic The 400 Blows, will give even the most ignorant film-viewer a crash course in classic film. Jean Renoir’s Grand Illusion is way ahead of its time with its satire and camera movements, as is Wild Strawberries and its examination of the human condition by the endlessly talented Ingmar Bergman. The Third Man is a classic film noir with expressionistic lighting and a brilliant Orson Welles performance.

These films star and are written and directed by the best of the best of filmmakers from around the globe. Use your newfound knowledge of classic film to impress your friends when you get back from vacation.

The “trashy” movie marathon

The Big Bird Cage
Zapped
Waxwork
They Live
Road House

There are plenty of garbage films out there, but only a few trashy films transcend their genre and become pure hilarious entertainment. The Big Bird Cage is a movie about a group of slutty women stuck in a prison camp who end up raping their sadistic and campy gay male prison guards. It’s awesome. Zapped and Waxwork are two of the best (read: worst) genre films of the 1980’s, Zapped of the sex comedy genre and Waxwork of the comedy-horror genre.

This marathon ends with the one-two punch of “classic” trash movies—They Live with evil aliens whose plans of world domination are foiled by WWF star Rowdy Roddy Piper, and Road House with the glistening nearly naked body of Patrick Swayze and his throat-ripping, philosophy-spouting and roundhouse-kicking ways.

The “laugh while you still can” movie marathon

The Philadelphia Story
The Producers
Dr. Strangelove or: How I Learned to Stop Worrying and Love the Bomb
This is Spinal Tap
Sullivan’s Travels

By the time you know it, you’ll be back in class, toiling away with endless busy work and your crappy work-study job—so laugh it up while you still have a sense of humor.

These films range from the satirical nuclear annihilation comedy Dr. Strangelove to the classic screwball comedy The Philadelphia Story. This is Spinal Tap and The Producers are two musts for comedy fans, and even though you may have already seen them, they warrant repeat viewings for the gut laughs they produce. The marathon is rounded off with one of the greatest comedies of all time, Sullivan’s Travels, a film that remains thoughtful, hilarious and relevant 65 years after it was released.