Video Fun with Biff

We’ve all got siblings or know somebody who does. Personally, my older brother paved the way with his blatant abuse of teachers and lack of respect for rules in general.

This had both negative and positive consequences for me.

Perhaps your older sibling is setting too high a standard for you to reach or maybe a younger one is hogging all the attention.

Well boys and girls, those rich and famous Hollywood types have the exact same problem. Just imagine that you’ve worked all your life for that big break and then your younger, less talented and less attractive little brother comes along and makes a mint off of your shared last name. Welcome to world of Hollywood siblings.

Probably the most recognizable and talented of this gang of name abusers is Chris Penn, brother of Sean. Sure, he’s played a significant role in such classic films as “Reservoir Dogs,” “Short Cuts” and “True Romance” but do you remember 1984’s “The Wild Life”?

Penn’s role in the movie as the carefree surfer is such a blatant rip-off of brother Sean’s “Fast Times at Ridgemont High” character Spicoli that it should be a crime.

������ Check out this clever transition: Did you know that Sean and Chris have a brother Michael who is a very successful musician who also had a small role in “Boogie Nights”?

Speaking of brother-musicians, what about everybody’s favorite famous brother, Frank Stallone. Frank’s brother Sylvester is truly a kind and forgiving man. Sly gave Frank his first screen time as a singer in “Rocky” and also chose his song for the theme of the horrendous “Staying Alive,” which Sly himself directed.

Aside from being a semi-successful musician and the punch line to approximately 132 Norm MacDonald jokes, Frank Stallone has acted in well over 40 films. My personal favorite being the low budget “Death Feud,” co-starring famous actor Robert Mitchum’s less than successful son Christopher.

In Biff’s book, the third most “successful,” and by that I mean you have more of a chance of seeing him on Cinemax at three in the morning then anybody else, is Don Swayze.

Biff’s going to say this right now: He loves Don Swayze. Don looks so similar to brother Patrick that it’s creepy. However, Don seems to take all the Swayze characteristics to the extreme. If you placed one hand on Patrick’s head and one on his chin and then squeezed down real hard, that would be the face of Don Swayze.

In contrast to his brother, Don almost always plays the role of the villain – not the head villain mind you, but something more like the villain’s right-hand man. Biff feels that Don perfected this uncanny ability to play the right-hand man in the 1991 action film that reunited Corey Feldman with Meredith Salenger, “Edge of Honor.” Biff highly recommends this one as it finds Feldman at perhaps his most confused stage of his career.

Now let’s get down to some more siblings. There’s Joey Travolta, brother of John, who we all remember from his heartfelt performance in the Anna Nicole Smith film, “To the Limit.” Who can forget Martin Sheen’s brother, Joe Estevez, who has more than 100 films to his credit, including the 1995 Tonya Harding thriller “Breakaway,” which includes a scene shot at our very own OMSI.

Perhaps the weirdest of all is Jim hanks – yes, kids, the younger brother of Tom, who commands your attention in 1992’s “Buford’s Beach Bunnies.”

Although Biff has already suggested some titles for your viewing pleasure, these next few selections are truly “brothers of famous actors” master works.

If it’s action you want, it’s action you’ll get in “Delta Force 3.” This crapfest sports the who’s who of the famous sibling world. There’s Eric Douglas, the half brother of Michael and son of Kirk. Also starring is Chuck Norris’ punk kid, Mike Norris, brother of “Office Space” stunts coordinator Eric. This film also contains Penn brother number four, the Daniel Baldwin of the family, Matthew.

However, if there’s one movie you see all year, make it the “Citizen Kane” of all famous sibling movies, that’s right folks, “Beach Babes from Beyond.” With a star-studded cast that includes Joe Estevez, Don Swayze, Joey Travolta and Frank Stallone’s mother, Jackie, this movie truly is something to behold. Beach babes and famous peoples’ brothers never looked so good.

The only thing that sets all these brothers apart is usually the budget and the script, and the good looks. But hey, pretty has never equaled talented. Unless your name is Johnny Depp.