For those of you who need to buy gifts for nieces, nephews, significantly younger siblings or the children of friends, the holidays can be a very difficult time for shopping. Even parents can be at a loss. Every child is different, but there are certain toys that no child wants—period. Take our word for it. Here’s some help for steering clear of this year’s least popular kids’ gifts.
For those of you who need to buy gifts for nieces, nephews, significantly younger siblings or the children of friends, the holidays can be a very difficult time for shopping. Even parents can be at a loss.
Every child is different, but there are certain toys that no child wants—period. Take our word for it. Here’s some help for steering clear of this year’s least popular kids’ gifts.
Photo courtesy of amazon.com
My first cleaning trolley: A tacky, sexist piece of shit that should never, under any circumstances, be sitting under a Christmas tree (unless your kid aspires to be a maid—then it’s fine).
Toys in general
Amazon.com price: varies
Sorry Toys R Us shareholders: Electronics are the new teddy bears. Kids are now asking for iPads and smartphones instead of Barbies and Disney play sets, and the grandparents can’t figure out why. Heck, they can even get Barbie and Disney games for their iPads and smartphones.
My First
Cleaning Trolley
Amazon.com price: $39.99
Giving this to your kid makes it obvious that you have no hopes for your child to become anything more than a housewife or husband. Not only does the set come with a plastic vacuum and mop, but a matching plunger is also included. For girls who think this toy isn’t sexist enough, there’s a “Girls Only” version in pink.
Pro Thumb
Wrestling Arena
Amazon.com price: $7.99
Even though this toy is useless (it will probably only get used once, if ever), people are actually buying it. Thumb wrestling isn’t that much fun to begin with, so why make your kid look seven times dorkier
doing it?
The Breast Milk Baby (Bebe Gloton)
Amazon.com price: $89.99
The slogan of this doll is “Because you shouldn’t have to wait until you have breasts before you start breastfeeding your baby.” Last time I checked, the children in the targeted age group (24 months) don’t usually know where babies come from to begin with—let alone why babies drink milk from somewhere other than a bottle.
Socks and
underwear
Amazon.com price: varies
Unless you have attached some sum of money to these garments, the kids unwrapping these gifts are going to first give you a very disappointed look and then put you on their hit list. Also, don’t trust kids who keep hit lists.
Anything Woman’s Day recommends
Amazon.com price: varies
This is not surprising, since this magazine also recommends shoving a box over your kid’s head and punching out eyeholes for a Halloween costume that attempts to pass as a robot. For a women’s magazine that offers parenting tips, it has no idea what kids actually want. Most gifts listed in their December edition involve handmade toys like knitted lambs or dressers full of art supplies. While some kids love stuffed animals or arts and crafts, most will have the lamb (as well as the rest of the kitchen) covered in glitter and paint in no time.
