The wonderful world of condoms

The condom. It has become as impressed upon our pop culture as it has in the leather of many a man’s wallet. Some praise its birth control, while some look to it as a means of keeping away a nasty sexually transmitted infection (STI) or two. So cut out the giggling. This is a very serious subject that you need to know about, just in case your pee-pee meets a hoo-ha.

A little history

Condoms have been around for some time now. They possibly date all the way back to ancient Egypt, in fact. But the condom we all have come to know began back in the mid-1800s with Charles Goodyear. That’s right, the tire guy. Goodyear patented vulcanized rubber in 1839 and by 1855, he got the idea to expand his uses for rubber into the contraception market. However, the condom of 1855, well, it was everything you would expect from a condom made by a guy who made tires.

Over the years, condoms evolved into its modern version, made from latex, polyurethane or most recently polyisoprene. Historically, they have been used to prevent pregnancy. However, it also proved to aid in STI prevention as well. In fact, when syphilis began posing a problem during the 16th century, Gabriele Fallopius wrote a lengthy account of a condom-like device which consisted of chemically soaked linen meant to prevent infection.

In 2005, Consumer Reports released a guide to contraception products. They found that most brand name condoms such as Trojan or Durex all stood up to the test and basically performed the same. But still, your average store has a wall of the product, each brand trying to outsell the other. With so many varieties, what kind of condom should you choose?

Textures, lotions and other gimmicks

As Garth Algar put it, “Ribbed for her pleasure. Ewww.” He was talking about the textured condom, which well, has various textures imprinted on it. Other gimmicks may include warming lotions or glow-in-the-dark styles. This really comes down to having a conversation with your significant other.

Spermicidal lubricant

Some condoms may have this listed on their box. Consumer Reports has noted that the spermicidal lubricant doesn’t really do anything special beyond what a normal condom does. In addition, they also noted that spermicidal condoms have a shorter shelf life and may cause urinary tract infections in women. They may, however, offer that extra bit of mental comfort.

Flavored condoms

Pretty self-explanatory. Condom companies found a way to include flavors in their condoms. Your imagination can take care of the rest. One thing to keep in mind with flavored condoms: Just because they are condoms doesn’t mean they are meant for sexual intercourse when they are flavored. The flavor aspect may indicate that they are meant for just, er, another form of contact.

The FDA monitors such condoms so check the label or the box to make sure it’s up to the task. It has also been noted that sugar in such flavored condoms may contribute to yeast infections in women. Some flavored condoms come in sugar-free flavors.

Edible condoms

Look, if you have to have this spelled out for you then please, don’t have sex, ever. These condoms obviously are NOT for contraception or protection against STIs. They are a novelty item.

The French tickler

Yes, they actually do exist, even if only in the vending machines of men’s bathrooms. This is another condom that is NOT meant for any protection against pregnancy or STIs. They are designed for stimulation and comedic purposes only.

Sizes

An unnecessary aspect of the condom for most people. They are made from rubber after all, and in case you didn’t know, rubber stretches. But some brands, such as Trojan’s famous Magnum condoms, are made in varying lengths and widths to accommodate, er, a diverse market. There are also smaller condoms…