24 things you probably won’t go to

Thursday, April 1

Josh Ritter

Aladdin Theater

7 p.m.

$10, $12 door

Josh Ritter is a singer-songwriter. He plays an acoustic guitar and some people compare him to Nick Drake and Bob Dylan. Cheap admission. Comfy Aladdin seats. Dylan and Drake. Sounds good.

Wu-Tang Takeover Tour Featuring GZA (Genius), Ghostface Killa, Killah Priest, Cappadonna, Masta Killa, Dreddy Krueger, DJ City Rich, Sake, and Remedy

Berbati’s Pan

$18, $20 door

21+

There are a lot of people named Killa(h) on this tour. Maybe it’ll be a “killa” show! Ah-ha-ha-ha!

Three Days Grace

Roseland Theater

8 p.m.

$10

To better represent Three Days Grace, I thought they should speak for themselves through their lyrics. Here’s an example: “I must be running out of luck/ Cause you’re just not drunk enough to fuck.” Suck-tacular couplets like this one abound in their songs of clich퀌�d angst. You’d be better off spending the $10 on beer or on a shiny new record, preferably one without mind-numbingly bad lyrics.

Friday, April 2

The Adolescents, Dek, The Observers

Meow Meow

$12

All ages

The Adolescents have been around for a long time and have included members of Social Distortion, Agent Orange and, for a little while, Pat Smear. I thought they broke up in the late 80s, but apparently they decided to reunite and bring their surf-influenced heavy punk up to Portland for a visit.

Defiance, Restart

Paris Theater

7:30 p.m.

$7

Another punk show tonight. Defiance is comprised of some PDX street-punkers who rock hard and fast and frenetic, propelling their anti-establishment, activist messages on gritty explosions of pogo-worthy guitar.

“MC5 – A True Testimonial”

Clinton St. Theater

Opens April 2

7 p.m.

Free

Legendary Detroit rockers and renegades the MC5 are profiled in this documentary, from their involvement with the Black Panthers to their troubles with the FBI. And it’s free.

Damien Rice, The Frames

Roseland Theater

8 p.m.

$20

The Frames have yet to crack the U.S. market, so here’s your chance to see them before their next U.S. tour, which will surely see them playing huge arenas and amphitheaters, if their talent for crafting emotive yet mature indie-pop songs is any indication.

Pom Pom Meltdown, Discharge Information System, The Lovers

Nocturnal

8 p.m.

$5

Pom Pom Meltdown shreds more than most bands I’ve seen in the past year, rivaled only by the Melvins for wicked metal-riffing and cacophonous feedback whirlwinds. Definitely go see them, if you haven’t before.

Saturday, April 3

The Distraction, Born Losers

Twilight Caf퀌�

The Distraction can hopefully distract you from your mundane existence with their new-wavey mod- punk stylings. If not, then they ought to change their name.

Carnival! Benefit for p:ear featuring DJin Teeth (Fangs), Shatterville, Mother Siberia, American Nightmare, The Formless, Big Bang Circus! Face painting by Extremo The Clown! Coloring Contest! Games!

Nocturnal

6:30 p.m.

The Nocturnal is hosting a benefit for the p:ear gallery, with all this wild stuff going on.

There is a suggested donation ranging from $2 to $10, but that’s a small price to pay for having your face painted by someone named Extremo.

Green Circles, Jackie, Stars of Track and Field

Berbati’s

9:30 p.m.

21+

All these groups play variations on the fuzzy guitar pop that we’ve come to love since its birthing in the ’60s, with dashes of the ever-popular new wave to add flavor.

Flamenco Vivo!

Aladdin Theater

7 p.m.

$19

Some of the west coast’s most famous (?) flamenco musicians band together for a night of flamenco performance. Unfortunately, there probably won’t be any dancing allowed. I think there’s someone who dances on the stage with the musicians, but other than that, don’t count on much of a chance to show off your flamenco moves.

Fannypack, Gravy Train!!!, The Punk Group, The Fitness

Dante’s

10 p.m.

$10, $12 door

21+

Gravy Train!!! hails from Kill Rock Stars and composes Casio-driven songs with titles like “You Made Me Gay” and “Pussy Thrusts.” Fannypack plays similarly saucy hip-hop, with The Fitness and The Punk Group providing electro and punk to keep you in shape.

Shake Your Booty for Busse featuring Sarah Dougher, the Beauty

Meow Meow

8 p.m.

This is Phil Busse’s latest in a series of events to woo the hipster/alcoholic vote, although he probably doesn’t have to worry about that since, as the managing editor of The Mercury, he’s already got that down.

Sunday, April 4

Paper Car, Pain Theory, Prime Number, Abrupt Edge, Blacklist 40, Numb 436, Devolution X

Meow Meow

6 p.m.

$8

Hardcore metal blowout! 7 bands is a lot for eight bucks.

Jimmy Smith Group

Aladdin Theater

7 p.m.

$20, $22 door

Supposedly, Jimmy Smith is a Hammond organ virtuoso, renowned for his ‘blazing licks.’

Apparently B.B. King and Etta James think so, too, since they supported Smith on his last album. It’s doubtful that they will be touring with him, performing backup for $20 shows, but ‘blazing licks’ seem worth checking out no matter who plays them.

The Minds, Plan R, Meaty Bishops

Twilight Caf퀌�

Super raunchy, catchy punk riff rock with a serious keyboard injection has earned The Minds a reputation, bolstered by their frenetic live shows.

Blackalicious, DJ Shadow, Lateef and the Chief, Latyrx, Lifesavas, Lyrics Born, The Gift of Gab, Joyo Velarde, DJ D-Sharp

Roseland Theater

8 p.m.

$20

The name Lateef and the Chiefs cracks me up. I can’t even say it with a straight face. No matter how you stress the syllables, it still comes out weird. Not that this has anything to do with their actual output, with which I am totally unfamiliar. I am sadly out of touch with current musical trends, although I know Lifesavas and Blackalicious are a part of them.

Cold Crush DJs Chase and Tony Tone, DJ/MC Grandmaster Caz, Grand Wizzard Theodore

$18 advance, $22 day of show

Berbatis

Don’t even waste time at any other concert tonight. This is the hot shit. Do not pass up this chance to see some of the architects of hip-hop, including the inventor of scratching (!) Grand Wizzard Theodore. All these DJs and MCs are insanely good, as anyone who has seen Wild Style can attest to.

Monday, April 5

Ralph Nader Nominating Committee

Roseland

7 p.m.

Nader, the perennial annoyance, makes an appearance at the Roseland, of all places, to preach to his choir and steal votes away from Kerry. I heard one of his major contributors in the 2000 elections was Bush. It would make sense for Bush to support him now.

DEVO “The Complete Truth about de-evolution”

Hollywood Theater

7:30 p.m.

How awesome is this? A Devo documentary! Not only will it treat you to over an hour of Devo footage, but it delves into their history (and mystery). It’s also free.

“Live! Tonight! Sold Out!”

Clinton St. Theater

9:30 p.m.

Ah, what memories this video brings back … of high school. Stealing beer from suburban garages, smoking weed out of apples and pop cans, and watching this excellent collection of live Nirvana footage, home video, and interview. This showing is free, and happens to be starting just when the Devo movie would get out. This will be a nice relaxing night for you after attending the Cold Crush show the previous night.

Iron & Wine, Holopaw, Patrick McKinney, DJ Dickel

Holocene

9 p.m.

$8, $10 door

Iron and Wine is a band that I’ve been hearing about and want to listen to at some point. Apparently, it’s one guy singing hushed, restrained, intimate songs that are put out by Sub Pop, conjuring images of the pastoral south from whence he hailed.

Tuesday, April 6

Iggy and The Stooges “Live in Detroit 2003”

Hollywood Theater

7:30 pm

Don’t miss this chance to see Iggy reunited with the Ashetons on video, playing live in their hometown, from the comfort of a theater seat. Give me Stooges over MC5 any day of the week.

– The Calendar Boy