Keep on rockin' in the free world?

	Is there anything more whiney and childish than all the “I’mmoving to Europe” bullshit spewing forth from many folk’s mouths?Yeah, that’ll really help the progressive cause: a continentalbrain drain. Retreat is for pussies and the Baldwin brothers.
	Strange that a country founded on religion is now completelylost on it. I place partial blame on Scott what’s-his-ass fromCreed, who single-handedly ruined Jesus for everyone under 30.
	It’s gonna be hell trying to buy a bong in 2006.
	The Democrats need to take a page out of Japanese robotcartoons and form like Voltron. They’ll need the battle skills ofJohn Kerry, the fierceness of Howard Dean, the sharp looks of JohnEdwards, the ideology of General Clark and the personality ofClinton. Then it’s trouble for the Decepti-republi-cons. Wait,wrong cartoon.
	Dixie Chicks vs. Toby Keith, take two. What happened to the Baby Boomers? This is your guy? This is theshining star of your generation? He’s your American Bono? If athird of Bush voters were similar to us students in beliefs andideals back in the’60s, then that’s about 20 million people who gotswallowed up by the system and spat out as their parents. 20million people who said, “It ain’t gonna happen to me.” 20 millionpeople who watched their friends die in Vietnam. Wow.
	Anyone else wondering what happens to Michael Moore now? Ithink he was betting that Bush would be gone and he’d receive a bitof the credit. Something tells me that his next film has even moretrouble getting released.
	If your last name starts with the letter “C,” where does thatput you in the draft? Or is it birthdays? I’ve always wanted toride in a Hummer, just like Rasheed Wallace.
	I can’t wait to listen to Creedence and smoke non-filters, allwhile patrolling the banks of the Tigris and dodging shoulderrocket fire in Basra.
	Is it geologically possible to fold the country like a napkinso that the eastern foothills of Mount Hood back up into New York’sLincoln Tunnel? All that red area in the middle of the continent ismostly unnecessary. The U.S. would look like a long-ass Japan, andKerry would be our Prime Minister or if you’re Ken Jennings, ourJunichiro Koizumi.
	Wasn’t Britney Spears’ eloquent endorsement of President Bushin “Fahrenheit 9/11” enough to make suburban Ohio moms run into thearms of John Kerry? I guess not.