Things to do before midterms kill you

Tonight

Portland Organic Wrestling
Things a little tame in your life? Haven’t seen enough Pabst-fueled violence and mayhem starring your favorite Portland rockers? At POW, anything can happen, and usually does. Just remember to wear your safety goggles, and be prepared for wraslin’ dirtier than anything done by those hulks of the WWF.

Satyricon, 125 N.W. Sixth Ave., 21+ w/ID


X-Ecutioners, The Coup, Kenny Muhammed
The X-Ecutioners come outta NYC and are on a mission to make sure all those left coast DJ crews know what’s up. And they’ve been successful – so successful that they’ve got a single and video with guests rap-rockers Linkin Park. Thankfully, Linkin Park is staying home for this one. Just remember your Adidas and a helmet for headspins – we’re talking breakdance circles galore at this one. See related story on The Coup (page 6).

Crystal Ballroom, 1332 W. Burnside St., 9 p.m., all-ages, $13 adv./$15 door

Friday

George Clinton & Parliament Funkadelic
Clinton and co. funk it better than anybody, ever. And while the days when George emerged from a giant UFO for thousands at the Oakland Coliseum are long past, the Atomic Dog still keeps ’em funkified. Don’t forget your sunglasses and dancing shoes. You’re gonna sweat.

Crystal Ballroom, 1332 W. Burnside St., 9 p.m., all-ages, $26.50 adv./$29 doors

Saturday

The Dolomites
This junkyard sextet is known to leave audiences scratching their heads and dancing little jigs in turns. We’re talkin’ polka-meets-ska-meets-Tom Waits-meets-klezmer-meets-just plain weird. Weird, but good. Bring a flask of rotgut and your yuppie repellant, ’cause this one’s at a pub known for its “Friends”-like couches and extra-large beer selection.

The Bitter End, 1981 W. Burnside St., 9 p.m., 21+ w/ID, $5

Fernando y Los Cochinos, Freddy Trujillo y Los Guys, Ollin
It’s the day before Cinco de Mayo, but don’t let that stop you from enjoying Fernando’s Tex-Mex flavor. He’s bringing some friends, including Ollin, a rock en espanol group from East L.A., and Freddy Trujillo, PSU student extraordinaire. Bring your Spanish phrase book so you can sing along.

Satyricon, 125 N.W. Sixth Ave., 21+ w/ID

Zac Love
Madame Butterfly’s resident DJ blesses us with a night of dub, roots, reggae and ska; What he calls “a smoking selection of the little Island’s greatest hits.” Listen for classics from the ’60s and ’70s as well as contemporary electronic dub and UK second wave ska. Bring your best-behaved self (it’s a small place) and remember the drinks are cheap after midnight.

Madame Butterfly, Southwest Fifth and Stark, 9 p.m., 21+ w/ID


The Dwarves
We were considering interviewing the Dwarves down here at the Vanguard, but we figured any blood they splattered would lose us our student-fee funding. Twelve years ago in Seattle, one A&C staff member saw former guitarist He Who Cannot Be Named get pegged in the head with a bottle and continue to play as blood poured down his face. Another of us saw him pull one of the toughest guitar-tricks know to man: Pissing on stage while continuing to play. He Who Cannot Be Named has since become He Who Disappeared on Tour Without a Trace, but the Dwarves are still LOUD, VIOLENT, OBNOXIOUS DIRTY PUNKS. Bring your earplugs.

Berbati’s Pan, 231 S.W. Ankeny St., 9 p.m., 21+ w/ID, $12

Sunday

‘Hollywood Ending’
Woody Allen’s latest offering is supposed be another self-referential film full of Allen-isms. Possibly a return to form, Allen stars as a has-been director attempting a comeback while psychosomatic blindness sets in. Tia Lioni co-stars.

Fox Tower 10, Southwest Park and Taylor

Tuesday

OMCO presents Miles Tillman, Solenoid, Catch 22
Portland’s David Chandler (Solenoid) on music: “I have lots of ideas and tend to reject nearly every preconceived notion (that I notice in myself) about what I think I ‘should’ or ‘shouldn’t’ do with music.” Courtesy of Outward Music Company, more explorations into the possibilities of music. Bring your brain.

The Blackbird, 3728 N.E. Sandy Blvd., 21+ w/ID