It’s complicated

Brian, who asked that his real name be omitted from print, is a 19-year-old soldier who recently moved to Alaska and is required to live in the barracks there. He recently posted an ad on Craigslist titled “Seeking marriage.”

“Usually I would never use Craigslist,” he said. “I only tried it because…I’m not going to meet a girl up here,” he said.

Millions of college-aged students like Brian use Craigslist, Facebook and other websites for as many romantic purposes as the human mind can invent. Social media has re-invented dating, making the idea of meeting somebody online, flirting over the Internet, and even breaking up to the tune of intense social-networking drama, more and more common.

The personals section on Craigslist offers nine categories, from “strictly platonic” to “casual encounters,” and on Facebook six relationship status options include “it’s complicated” and “in an open relationship.”

“I’ve been seeing a guy for a few weeks and he often refers to me as his girlfriend…but refuses to change his Facebook status from being single,” read a posting that started a thread of comments on the a discussion board on Facebook.

A reply by Facebook user Ian Gadd advised that the guy in the few-weeks-old relationship should manipulate Facebook’s privacy settings.

“Set up the new privacy settings so that *only* the ‘other half’ (and perhaps her close friends) can see your r-status,” Gadd said.

Whether or not Gadd’s advice that men hide relationship statuses is within the parameters of good etiquette remains to be seen. In an article published by TIME last year, “Your Facebook Relationship Status: It’s Complicated,” Claire Suddath described the absence of established social expectations on Facebook and other social media.

“A Jane Austen of Facebook has yet to emerge, let alone a Miss Manners, and no one seems to have a grip on what the social norms ought to be,” Suddath wrote.

The “Casual Encounters” section on Craigslist accounts for two percent of all ads posted on Craigslist today. Devoted to no-strings-attached rendezvous, Casual Encounters is a popular space for young users.

But popular opinion still deems relationships that begin outside of Facebook and other social media sites to be somehow more legitimate.

The domain manager of the Facebook discussion board that hosted a back-and-forth comment chain about the proper time to expect a partner to change his or her relationship status from “single” to “in a relationship” commented, “I’ve come to decide that I dont (sic) think it matters that much about your Facebook status unless Facebook is your lone source for getting dates.”