This week’s schluppp

The Strokes

Room On Fire

Every vintage clothing store and rock ‘n’ roll barbershop in town should cut The Strokes a check. Let’s call them The White Belts. What do you tell a friend, a grown man, who emulates every aspect of these fools’ borrowed fame?

Pointy Boots? Check. Hair? Check. All-denim Mexican tuxedo? Double check. And if The Strokes get a cut of that check, then some of that money should be going to Iggy Pop, The Velvet Underground, and, now The Cars. Oh, who gives a shit, they write a good song.

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Explosions in the Sky

The Earth is Not a Cold Dead Place

This is a fine instrumental band. Just like a fine instrumental band, Explosions play long, sweeping epics that build with layered guitars and subtle background beats until their watery ripple is suddenly a tsunami of sound crashing down on your ear hole. It’s murder. If the Earth is not a cold, dead place, why then is this album so chilly? Frigid like penguin bones.

Outkast

Speakerboxxx / The Love Below – split LP

The Onion ran the headline “Outkast Universally Accepted” with a photo of Big Boi and Andre chillin’ with Jay Leno a couple weeks ago. Why is that so true? These cats have a broader fan base than Clinton. Of course, The Onion was prodding mainstream America’s non-fear of Outkast’s non-gansta image. Andre doesn’t look very hard wearing a plaid suit and yellow tie, standing below the Eiffel Tower in front of an Aston Martin. People eat it up.

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“Hey Ya!” is already the biggest hit of the year (sorry, Miss Jackson). I bet you’ll hear that shit at Nordstrom’s by Christmas. Half the songs are throwaways, but what’s good here is great. I sort of feel for Big Boi, because Andre’s The Love Below is what’s really selling this double album.